10 Real Tips for Dealing With Menstrual Pain (That No One Wants to Talk About)
Menstruation holds an enormous potential to draw us into our instinctual brain - and deepen our connection to psychic and shamanic states, which are often communicated through sensation and bodily states. When we are unable to truly drop into that space of instinctual communication because of fear, trauma, or discomfort, we miss the message, so the message our body and being is trying to communicate with is, so that message shouts louder; this is the mechanism that generates pain. These tips are for those women who are afflicted by enormous pain with their monthly cycles, which is simply not understood or acknowledge on a level of seriousness beyond painkillers by the medical community, or society.
Real menstrual pain is worse than a migraine, and often includes one to boot. It is an enormously debilitating issue - and this article holds some seriously practical tips to help not only relieve that pain prior to and during your cycle - but also how to manage that pain while you are in it; and how to begin to benefit from that pain, and communicate with it. The invitation is to lean into the lessons which deepen your instinctual brain connection. When reading this, you may also recognise you instinctively (or unwillingly) do some of these (or are forced into these) during your cycle already.
Menstrual pain is caused by energy build up (usually resulting in contractions, spasms, and heat) in the uterus; the strength of uterine contractions is directly related to the power of uterus, and the thickness and/or stiffness (esp. if you have fibroids, cysts, endo- or adenomyosis) of the uterine walls and tissues, and fluid movements in the pelvic bowl. Before you menstruate, energy begins to gather, pulse, and build in your womb - hence premenstrual tension, and often a sour mood, as energy tries to circulate through the muscles, structures, blood, emotions, and fluids collecting in your lower body, readying for your cycle. The organs in your pelvic bowl are something you should begin to get deeply acquainted with, so make sure you look at some anatomy pics or take a course (such as our courses on goldenlotusdxb.com) to really understand. I’ve included some images in this article, and DuvetDays does some beautiful images if you’d like to order something to have on your bedside table to remind you of your practices for your cycle.
These tips range from the days prior to bleeding, and the first two days of your cycle - the heaviest - to dramatically reduce pain, all the way to during your cycle and prevention.
1) Diet: During the week prior - and specifically the day/days prior to bleeding - irrespective of your cravings, begin to cut back on food - and drink a lot of juice. Anyone with REAL menstrual pain will tell you that there are a few things which really relieve it; going to the bathroom (#2s), and orgasm. Both of these things activate the muscles which are tense, and release heat and pressure inside the pelvic bowl. Your womb sits against your rectum, and behind your bladder, so making sure you are drinking a lot of water and juice, and that your intestines are not full (of hot poo) before your womb begins to bleed, is an enormous relief for your womb and ovaries, as it means a lot less heat, and a lot less pressure on your womb. Heat in the uterus, often transmitted by the rectum, clots blood, and builds up a lot of unnecessary extra menstrual pain. More space means the pulsing and bleeding is easier, and more fluid pulsation and contraction is less painful.
Fresh fruit juice cools the system; fruit juice is a highly intelligence substance which can heal the body in ways that only stem cells can in some instances; use this to your advantage. Lots of water means your body can replenish the fluids it looses through any heat building up, so the blood is cooler, and brighter, and more fluid.
To sum up;
- Keep your bowels as empty so you have more space in your pelvic bowl. You’ll accumulate less heat, pressure and stagnation leading up to your period, and suffer less pressure and heat from the rectum to the uterus during your period.
- When you eat less, juice more.
- Keep well hydrated with water.
2) Enema: Tied into diet and keeping your intestines empty, and taking up less space and causing less pressure and heat is enemas. Try a warm, or cool (not cold) water enema while you are menstruating. I know sometimes with excruciating pain, the last thing which feels right is sticking water up your bum - however the cool water calms and cools the nervous system in the sacrum which is also innervating the uterus and ovaries, vaginal canal, and all of your painful structures, along with contracting it slightly (less inflammation = more space = less pain) - and allowing fluid, lymph, and blood to circulate quicker, which means a quicker flow, with means less pain and stagnation. In addition, it can often directly cool and unstick the cervix which can also stick to the back of the vaginal wall during menses. This is because the womb is double the size and weight when it is full of the blood, and the cervix is low, and open. The back wall can then flop onto the rectum - so in effect it’s almost like having your cervix stuck your rectum. This enema trick really helps to stimulate the cervix and can just open up the whole pelvic space and relieve a lot of pain through the hips, the legs, and cool off those fierce, fiery ovaries. It might sound like some weird advice, but let’s get real, when your other options are Advil, the pill, or “lie down with a hot beanbag” when in reality you feel like passing out, vomiting, shitting, or maybe all three at once because that’s a real thing - and you can’t leave the house, it’s probably time to get real about what does work. Warm water is better for those who have an achy period - or tense cramps - it helps to relax the lower body. Either way the osmotic quality of the rectum and the lower abdomen can really help with blood flow, and releasing tension, heat, and toxins.
To sum up:
- Menstruation is a process of detoxification, and water helps us to detox. Try water absorption from another angle.
There is a whole body of work I teach around women’s health and I recommend this diet for ovarian health and womb sensitivity which cover a full regime - check it out (free) at goldenlotusdxb.com/diet
3) Inversion techniques: Inversions drain, stimulate and activate fluid accumulation in the pelvis. Gravity is a real thing, and so is the collection of lymphatic fluids, blood, and toxins in our pelvis and uterus. Inversions help the lymphatic system which doesn’t have it’s pump like our blood does - and relies on us to move, breathe, and be active. Equally, inversions just take the weight off the organs in the pelvis - which often need some space, and a moment to re-arrange. Do as many variations of inversions as you can in the 3 weeks surrounding your period. Don’t worry if you can’t do fancy instagram yoga inversions - just try these other fantastic techniques;
- Go to an aerial/fly yoga class or buy an aerial silk for at home. You can do inversions very easily and stay in them for much longer when you’re literally “hanging out upside down”.
- Just do a handstand or a simply headstand against the wall.
It really does not have to be fancy, it just has to work.
To sum up:
- Inversions generate space, increase circulation & drainage, and release tension, pressure and heat.
3) Inversions 2.0: During bleeding & painful moments of your period try cat/cow pose, child’s pose, or a Spinning Baby’s “forward leaning inversion pose” (look it up and remember it). All of these poses allow the uterus to move forward and take pressure off the uterine ligaments, which when your uterus is heavy and full of blood can relieve enormous pressure and tension in the pelvic bowl. Specifically the forward leaning inversion relaxes all of the uterine ligaments and opens the hips, which can really allow you to catch your breath in moments of pain. These movements will also tell you, just like warm or cold water in an enema will, what sort of period pain you have. These techniques will teach you if you need “compression” or “extension” - as the temperature of the water will tell you if you have inflammation or tension, which are all important things to know when managing chronic or acute pain.
To sum up:
- Inversions during your bleed will teach you about the nature of the pain you experience and how to work with that on a physiological and movement based level.
4) Gentle Movements: Address your sacral iliac joints and lower back; put your arm (wrist area) under your lower back, under the small of your back, and let your hand sit under your sacrum. Often this joint is inflamed from the heat in the nerves and muscles of the pelvis - so then the sacrum is stressed from ongoing muscle tension. Using your arm, or a rolled towel, or a pool noodle (of all things) just under the arch of the lower back can release and relieve the pain in the pelvic and hip joints and bones, and be a sweet breath in.
To sum up: The sacrum rules the innervation of the lower body, and can often have tension and heat built up. Releasing and relieving the sacrum will impact the pain and inflammation on the structures - like the womb - which it governs.
These next tips focus on less physical or physiological elements; we moves into the more esoteric space of energetic emotional support regulating our physiology, psychic states opening allowing us to move through pain. This means looking at energetic and emotional stagnation as a real cause of physiological tension or pain.
5) Breathe: Let yourself go into the pain; this is something we usually have no choice with, when we are bleeding - however the more intense the menstrual pain is, the more you will be faced with this option; vomit, shit, and bleed all at the same time while you intermittently pass out (yes, this is real people - this is what is it like for many women) or; begin to breathe deeply and completely surrender into the sensation of passing out inviting yourself to be taken into this space. Underneath the places where we experience pain, convulsion, and the threat of loss of consciousness lies the experience which menstruation has connected women to for eons; death & birth. The deep grounding of pure Being - a moment in which the experience of death is possible, and transformation, release and letting go is inevitable. This state takes some practice, and it also takes cultivating a connection to your womb and your breath outside of just the menstrual period. It takes a belief that there is a deeper meaning and space to be pulled into - and a willingness to invite that journey in. To believe you are safe, and held, in the experience of being a woman. Things to consider, nurture, and intend leading up to your bleed are practicing deep breathing, spinal meditations, and compressive breathing techniques (such as kriya yoga pranayama), so you have some repertoire of breath work when you are in the midst of pain during your bleed. Then begin to see what reveals.
To sum up: The menstrual cycle is a shamanic process of release, and breathwork can help you to become more comfortable to be drawn into the realms and receive restoration and somatic/sensual and physic communication from this space, versus just pain.
6) The Right Flow: If possible, spend time with other women with whom you feel spacious and strong. We know that the tides flow together, we know that our menstrual cycles sync with other women if we live with them - and we know imbalance and pain is affected by our own hormone balance. Being around other women even if they are not bleeding, while we are, relaxes the uterus, and can help to regulate our hormones via pheromonal wisdom. Pheromones impact our hormonal system deeply and immediately, and can help regulate our bleeding experience, and our pain. Invite a sister over, or try to connect online with nourishing websites, communities, women, and friends during your bleed. This can ease the weight and burden. If you have a husband or male partner, try sleeping alone for an evening, to see if being in your own female space for expansion will benefit the pain.
To sum up: The pheromonal balances of the communities, groups, and individuals we associate with impact our hormonal balance, and can either hinder or help our flow when it comes to menstruation. Find the help, and leave the hinder behind.
7) Energy: Wash your vagina. Just cold water, (or warm if you prefer) on the lips and vulva, while washing with your hands. You’ll feel fresh, it will cool the heat, and it just helps. The time of menses releases a huge amount of toxicity, blood, and experience/emotion from the body. Often the energetic information in our pelvis, in our blood, and the need to let go of things we may not be fully, emotionally “done” with causes the tension in our bleed. Sometimes we releasing more than we are ready to let go, and it “sticks”, cloys, and hurts - our body is resistant to release. Sometimes its difficult because we work through more than just our own pain during our bleed, and it’s hard to process the content and energy as it can be from people all around you; be kind to yourself; your cervix and crown chakra are deeply related, and you are open spiritually during your period. You are very sensitive, and you doing work of releasing for everyone who has come near you that previous cycle. This is a gift we have as women, but we are not taught how to harness it’s power, regulate it’s intensity, or experience it’s gifts often enough. Luckily, right now, this is something many women feel more invited and empowered to do, and yet we still lack a lot of practical, real conversation about the seriousness of period pain, and how to cultivate (with simplicity) a better environment in our lower body. That is what all of the work I teach is about - a re-contextualisation of our pelvic health from every level; spiritual, sexual, emotional, cerebral, neurological, endocrinological, anatomical, physiological, mystical, magical, psychological… all of it. The time has come for a next context, a new journey with our health, our power, and the meaning we give our journey within this sacred vessel.
To sum up: Washing your labia and vagina can remove some of the energetic qualities of the iron in the blood. Too much iron or blood is a breeding ground not just for infection, but also for negatively charged emotions and sensations. Washing clears away the residue of what we have already released, relieving with it any pain from that field, leaving us feeling fresh and alert.
8) Jade Egg: Here’s a big one; use your jade egg. Use your jade egg on the first and second day of your bleed, just briefly - use it for about 10 mins - 1 hour, or however you feel. It grounds the tension in the vaginal canal and uterus and stimulates the cervix, pulses the uterus gently, and activates the ovaries - which means that it helps your flow move smoothly - especially on those first few days of my bleed. This isn’t something you will be able to do walking around, so really carve out time to do it. As you are bleeding, the blood will cause the egg to come out if you walk around - however if you just use it around the house while sitting or lying down, it will cause some strong contractions and release, which can feel at least relieving, and at most, erotic and fantastic.
To sum up: The jade egg stimulates micro-muscles in the pelvis which can aid the release of your menstrual blood and ground some of the tension in the musculature and tissues of the pelvis. It helps to pulse and open the cervix when necessary, and de-clog a “sticky” period .
9) Massage: Massage your vaginal walls. Tension causes pain. There are two places you can relieve this tension very easily through pressure; find the introitus (entrance of the vaginal canal) and push down on either side of the opening, towards your rectum. You may even wish to hook your fingers slightly inside the entrance of the vagina. The idea is to find the spot that when pushing your labia or vaginal walls against/towards the bone, your feel tension to release all the way inside the pelvic bowl. From experience, it can be around the labia on the outside of the vaginal opening which releases the round ligaments and relaxes the uterus, or it can be actually pressing into the tension of the vaginal canal, and you will feel it up the sides of the vaginal canal, and into the ovaries. Either way, these pressure points and some pressure at the base of body and around the entrance of the vaginal canal can release an enormous amount of tension (which generates pain) through your whole pelvic bowl. This technique also relaxes the sacrum, and allows the hips to feel open.
To sum up: Internal touch and presence is so important during this sensation filled time of our cycle.
10) Orgasm: We all know about this one; the contractions help, the stimulation helps, the release of tension helps. Orgasm is essentially the tensing of muscles until they have to spasm into release. So it falls into the category of the jade egg and massage in that it’s all about stimulating the pelvis to release tensions - and all of this is important; so get to know what feels good for you, and what brings on a fresher, more open blood flow, and less pain.
To sum up: Orgasm makes all of the muscles in the lower body contract and then completely release. This motion helps to regulate your bleed, and allows whatever tension is in your body during your bleed to complete a cycle of build and release.
In addition to all of this, try the Golden Lotus Level 1 Cervix meditation, along with the ovarian massage techniques. If you haven’t done the Golden Lotus series then just google “Self Massage ATMAT”, “Arviggo Technique of Mayan Abdominal Therapy”, or “Taoist Ovarian Massage”, and give yourself a nice gentle, nurturing hip, pelvic and ovarian massage.
The reality is that if you suffer very painful periods and you’re willing to do things in other parts of your cycle - seek out a mayan abdominal therapist, or an experience yoni massage therapist - or download or invest in some online courses of self pleasure, or de-amouring such as the online Jade Egg portal, the online Level 1 or Level 2 work, or other online resources (there are so many fantastic books, podcasts, or online jade egg or pleasure or sensuality courses out there) for awakening and getting to know your cycle, your pelvis, and your sensual anatomy. Regular womb and vaginal therapeutic touch, or self awareness techniques are simply no less than vital for addressing menstrual pain and making the most of your pelvic experience.
The time of menses is releasing a huge amount of toxicity, blood, and experience/emotion from the body. Not just your own; it can be collective - from people all around you - and you are doing that work for them, and for everyone else. This is a gift we have as women, but we are not taught how to harness it’s power, or experience it’s gifts often enough. Luckily right now this is something many women feel more invited and empowered to do, and yet we still lack a lot of practical, real conversation about the seriousness of period pain, and how to cultivate (with simplicity) a better environment in our lower body. That is what all of Golden Lotus is about - a re-contextualisation of our pelvic health from every level; spiritual, sexual, emotional, cerebral, neurological, endocrinological, anatomical, physiological, mystical, magical, psychological - all of it. The time has come to shed some golden light on feminine journeys, and for a next context of health, power, and meaning we give our journey within this sacred vessel.